I'm starting a series titled "The Struggle Is Real". I'll be writing about the different struggles we as teenage girls go through. Some of the things I'll write about I've already written about, so I'll just re-write them differently.
As we go throughout our daily lives, we're bombarded with images of "perfect women". Our culture is telling us what we have to look like, how we have to dress, and how we have to act. And if we don't measure up to their standards then we're worthless. But how exactly do we know if we measure up? Hollywood has provided us with the answer. The golden ratio is a number (1.62 to be exact) which a certain group claim can be used to measure beauty. This number is used to measure everything from how far apart your eyes are, to how long your head is, to how much space you have between your chin and lips. If you measure really well (basically perfect according to this group), your numbers might hit 10.0. Then you can relax, with the assurance of knowing that you are beautiful. But what if you don't have the "right" numbers? Does that mean you're not pretty? Not at all. The golden ratio is only one way that people determine beauty. Many different people determine beauty in many different ways. There's not a one-size-fits-all mold to what a beautiful woman looks like. God created every woman to look different. He created some with brown eyes, some with green. Some with blonde hair, some with black. Some with white skin, some with brown. Some women are skinnier than others. But just because you look different than the women around you that others are defining as pretty doesn't mean that you're any less beautiful than them. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. One person might think someone is pretty while another person thinks they're not. But what people don't realize is that every single person is beautiful. Everyone is beautiful in their own way. The Bible tells us that God created man and woman in His own image and that it was good. It says that we are all fearfully and wonderfully made. Just because you don't look like the airbrushed supermodels doesn't mean you're not pretty.
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Did you know that throughout the Bible, we're commanded not to fear 365 times? Yet so many people are still afraid. People are afraid of many different things. Afraid of Satan, afraid of dying, afraid of being single for the rest of their lives, afraid of snakes, and a million other things. I just looked at a list of phobias and you could be afraid of literally anything. The only phobias I really have is Ophidiophobia, Taphophobia, and Cynophobia which is the fear of snakes, the fear of being buried alive, and the fear of dogs. But there are some people who have lots more phobias than 3. Some fears, such as my fear of being buried alive, are irrational. But as I said above, the Bible tells us 365 times to not be afraid. So, therefore, all fears are irrational. Yes, there are legitimate fears, but there shouldn't be. Here are my top 5 favorite verses commanding us not to fear.
1. John 14:27 Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid. 2. Joshua 1:9 Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go. 3. Psalm 34:4 I sought the Lord, and he answered me; he delivered me from all my fears. 4. Isaiah 41:13 For I am the Lord your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, "Do not fear; I will help you". 5. Isaiah 41:10 So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. There are 360 more scriptures about fear, but these are just my favorites. All 5 of these are promises. You don't have to be afraid of anything because God is always there with you. So don't fear. If you have a boyfriend, or even if you don't and there's just some guy that you like, you might have found yourself thinking "is he the one?" It can be hard to know if your boyfriend or your potential boyfriend is the guy God wants you to marry. Here are a few questions to ask yourself before moving too far into a relationship.
1. Is He A Christian? This is the most important question you need to ask. If the answer is no, then he is definitely not the one for you. 2 Corinthians 6:14 says, [Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?] This verse makes it very clear that we are not to be in a relationship with a non-Christian. 2. Does My Family Support Our Relationship? God has placed your family in your life for a reason. Yes, they may get on your nerves. A lot. But they can also provide helpful and godly advice; that is, if they're a Christian. If not, then I encourage you to ask your pastor, youth pastor, or mentor if they think you should move further into the relationship. Ask your parents, siblings, mentor, or another godly role model that is involved in your life. Then listen to them. Whatever they tell you will be for your own good. 3. Is Christ the Central Focus Of Our Relationship? Or is everything about you and him? Do you guys pray together and for each other, do you read the Bible together regularly, serve together, etc? There is nothing wrong with spending time together and talking about yourself and your hopes and dreams for the future, your struggles, and other things in your life. But you and your boyfriend should not be the main focus of your relationship. Jesus should be. 4. Does He Respect My Standards and Boundaries? A guy who truly cares about you will honor your standards. And he'll have a few of his own, too. If he doesn't respect your boundaries and standards, then he's probably not the one for you. There isn't a one-size-fits-all mold when it comes to relationships. But if you answered no to any of these questions, then that is a red flag and maybe you shouldn't go any further in this relationship. Also, don't only ask these questions and if you answered yes to all of them just rush right into a relationship. Pray. Seek God wholeheartedly and listen and wait for Him to speak to you. Keep an open heart and mind. Don't be closed off to what the red flags might be saying just because you like the guy. On Friday I asked the question "what is love?". We looked at 1 Corinthians 13, aka the love chapter, for the answer. [Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. 1 Corinthians 13:4-8] In case you missed Friday's post, you can read it here. We looked at what love is and does on Friday, so today we're going to be looking at what love is not and what it doesn't do.
1. Proud When I just looked up the exact definition of proud, some of the synonyms are joyful, delighted, satisfied, and glad. That doesn't sound so bad, does it? What's wrong with being joyful? Nothing. It's perfectly okay to be proud of yourself when, for example, you finish a difficult assignment or test. But pride for the wrong reasons and in the wrong things is sinful. Pride becomes sinful when you start to think that you're so much better than everyone else and that you can do everything on your own. [Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall. Proverbs 16:18] 2. Self-Seeking A self-seeking person is always trying to do things that benefit themselves. They don't do things in regard to others. They're only worried about themselves and what they can gain. 3. Easily Angered If someone is easily angered, that means that they get angry and blow up at the smallest, most insignificant things. If you forget to return their pencil to them and they get really angry at you, then that is not showing love. 4. Dishonor Others To honor someone means to put them and their needs above your own. If you truly love someone then you will worry about them more than yourself. 5. Keep Records of Wrongs If you keep a record of wrongs, that basically means that you hold grudges. I know from personal experience, grudges ruin relationships. 6. Delight In Evil Someone who delights in evil enjoys disobeying God, enjoys disobeying their parents or other authority, they enjoy sinning, etc. 7. Fail Love never fails. Ever. Even when you go through the toughest times, the people who truly love you will always be there for you. So I hope this post has encouraged and challenged you to love people the way the Bible commands us to. I know it's not always easy to love everyone unconditionally all the time, but it's what Jesus did and it's what He wants us to do. So even though it's hard sometimes, I know we can do it with God's help. Hey guys! So a website called Moody Publishers Newsroom sends me free Christian books if I read the books and write an honest review and post it on my blog. So here we go!
A Teen’s Guide To The 5 Love Languages by Dr. Gary Chapman and Paige Haley Drygas is an amazing book. It has truly helped me discover my own love language and it has also helped me to discover the love language of those closest to me. It’s taught me how to love my family better by understanding their language. It gives practical tips on how to discover your love language, how to discover others’ love languages, and how to show love to them when you figure out their language. I knew what my sister’s love language was, but I don’t speak the same language as her so I wasn’t quite sure how to show love to her. But because of this book I now know how I can love her in the way that she needs to be loved even though I don’t speak the same love language as her. The book gives you a list of things you could do to show love to those closest to you based on their love language. There is also a quiz at the back of the book to help you determine your primary love language. I would highly recommend this book to any teen wanting to learn how to better love those closest to them. |
MissionIn short, I started this blog because I want to give girls all over the world hope. All of the topics I write about on this blog are things that I have struggled with or am still struggling with. I want to help young women everywhere achieve freedom through Christ. Archives
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